Coming Out

Read a gay man's encounter with a homophobic mother:

"What are you gay or something?" This phrase resonated through the barber shop and the sound of turning heads created a sharp swoosh in unison. The little boy immediately began to cry, I'm sure wondering what was worse- hitting his brother or being called gay.

Of course, I could not state for certain that the little boy was indeed gay, but if he were, the public ridicule and tone of his mother's disappointed voice was enough to bruise his self-esteem and make him question whether his feelings were normal. We all seek some level of approval, especially from those closest to us. However, when that validation is missing, it can prompt feelings of loneliness, fear, confusion, grief and disappointment.

It is difficult for men of all ages to identify and accept their attraction to a member of the same sex. And during this time societal pressures can not only create a low self-esteem but delay the coming out process. How can a gay or bisexual man grow to accept themselves when they are seen as "freaks", "sinful" or "sick" by their surrounding environment? The after effects are different levels of openness within the gay community, where many men are afraid to disclose their sexuality to themselves, family, friends and co-workers for fear or rejection or even violence.

If you find yourself in this situation or in need of support, always remember that there is help. Being gay is a normal part of life and is not a deficiency in who you are. Seek others coming out or visit your local gay support groups for help or to interact with other gay people. You can also visit the Gay Life chat room or discussion forum. Often, an anonymous voice or non-judgmental ear is all you need to keep going!

Join the Discussion:

"Society has placed 'values' on us trying to make what is deemed taboo seem wrong because it would actually be 'normal' for us..."

-BOBRIDGE