I can't say that I remember the particular day I realized my brother was gay, but I honestly feel that he was born as the person he is today. Growing up with my brother was very exciting and special for me because he was "my baby" in a sense. Our mother worked long hours on an afternoon shift in a dangerous and stressful job. I had two brothers to watch after being the oldest of three and "my baby" was the highlight of my day and night. I remember picking him up from daycare, walking him home, helping him with homework, drawing his evening bath and preparing his dinner for the night.
I enjoyed how my baby would follow me anywhere in the house. "My little shadow", I often called him. I nurtured him and aided in his path to a promising career. I reminded him endlessly of the rights and wrongs of the world as I knew them.
When my baby turned 10 or 11 years old he moved away to live with his dad. I felt alone because it seemed like the one person in my life who I felt needed me was being taken away. Over the years our relationship remained solid and my baby knew he could rely on me for anything. I missed him terribly.
As his senior year of high school approached I was honored to see my brother graduate with honors and high recommendations. I was proud to see that he had indeed been surrounded with great friendships, love and support from a wonderful staff of teachers.
During his college years is when I noticed his anger, his fears, and his pain. Living in the closet was literally killing him. I don't believe my baby had a clue that I even knew. My mom knew of course, but I strongly believe my baby struggled with revealing his choice with me. I will never forget one Saturday morning when he was in his last semester of college. He was very stressed and I offered to come to his side and help. He refused, saying I didn't understand. I told my baby that I did indeed understand. I knew he wasn't troubled with school or graduation, but the manner in which he chose to live. I loved him regardless.
In the end he became a college graduate (the first child of our family). I am definitely proud of him and being the person he's become could not have suited him better. I have enjoyed watching my baby become a very strong, dependable, loveable, dedicated, and admirable individual with characteristics no one posses but him.
Despite what people or family may think about his sexuality, the love I share with my brother as the person he is will never be divided. His sexuality is only a part of him and should be his personal business, unless otherwise discussed by him. His sexuality should in no way define his entire being. There is no chance I would ever cut him that short, especially when he means the world to me. I love you baby brother and I couldn't be more proud of all your accomplishments.
In short, learning about and living with the fact that my bother is gay has not altered my opinion of him in anyway. He is still my brother. Always has been and always will be.