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Trouble Coming Out to Mom

By Ramon Johnson, About.com


Ramon,

I have just turned 17 and am having real trouble coming out. My mum is completely homophobic. She once told me that if I were gay she would kick me out! Recently, she has been making comments that if I were, she wouldn't mind; but I don't know whether to believe her or not. I am finding it really hard.

Sam


Dear Sam,

Your shell has cracked and you’re ready to burst free. Your mum, on the other hand, hasn’t been clear about her readiness to be a PFLAG mom. Normally, I would suggest you just hatch, but her earlier comment about kicking you out has me a little worried.

Thousands of homeless LGBT teens roam the streets because their mum (gotta love that expression) or dad live by the disillusioned “anything but gay” way of parenting.

Gay, lesbian and transgender teens make up 40% of all homeless youth on the streets. I don’t want you to become one of those statistics, especially not on the verge of coming out.

Sure, your mum’s recent “gay is OK” comment seems promising, but how can you be sure? Chill on the side of caution by keeping it cool at home. It won’t be easy, but coming out rarely is.

Soon you'll be old enough to be out on your own. Until then, keep feeling out your mom’s gay-friendliness. There’s no use hatching if you’re going to get fried; and your survival is my utmost concern.

Yours supporting,
Ramon
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