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Gay Married Man

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Dear Ramon,

I'm a 34 year old dentist from a country where gays are not accepted. I am married to a woman, but sure that I'm gay. About 4 months ago I developed a crush on one of my patients. He is married as well. We developed a friendship which started to get stronger. At last I dared to tell him that I loved him and surprising he said he loved me too.

He is afraid of having any physical contact with me. How can I tell him that I want to have sex with him? In Islam, gay relationships are stricly forbidden.


Dear Oral Lover,

The best way to approach this situation is the same way you've been handling it - with open and honest communication. Love and sexuality aren't bound by labels, so it's not uncommon for married men to realize that they are gay or start to have feelings for other men. Sometimes you don't need a label, such as gay or bisexual. Just go with your feelings.

Try talking to him openly about your sexual desires, just as you did expressing your love. At some point you will have to deal with the situation of your culture and your respective marriages. There are many men who are or have been married to women but have gay feelings. Take some time to browse the Gay Life forum. You'll be amazed at how many men are in similar situations. These men can also assist you by sharing their experiences being gay and married or gay in the islamic faith.

Yours in love,
Ramon

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