Luvmy3kids07: I'm a step mom to 2 boys and a mommy of one girl. My hubby's has two wonderful wonderful kids. my concern is the youngest who just recently turned 10.
He's special to me. Very sensitive, sweet and I know he's been through a lot in the past. (He witnessed a lot of emotional and verbal abuse in his previous home as a young child). Anywho, he has a bad tendency to lie about a lot of things. He seems insecure to me and almost as if he needs to pretend and make up things to "look" like he's "cool." He cries a lot and tends to hold things in. And no, these aren't the reasons I suspect that he may be gay. I don't know if I'm an idiot or not...
I catch him wearing my 6yr old daughters clothes, shoes and painting his nails. I don't yell at him, I just tell him that it's not appropriate because he's a lot bigger than my 6yr old and he may break her things. I also tell him that these clothes were made for girls not boys. He just replies that its fun. Oh yeah, he loves Barbies, Bratz and watching ballet on t.v. with my daughter and her female friends and/or cousins. He has an older brother but I honestly feel like he has more fun playing with the girls.....
Russ: I guess the question I have is why do you need to pinpoint his sexual orientation at 10 years old? If he has issues with his past then perhaps seeking counseling would help for that. Call me crazy, but I see no need to provide any different guidance than you would provide a 10 year old boy that you don't suspect of being gay.
ERM51: If there is any way you might be able to engage him in a one on one session, maybe he would open up to you and then you could discuss any issues or questions he might have.
U_Nome: I am 14. I have had some of the same things happen to me. When I was younger that is. I think that you really should just be there for support and make it very clear that if he ever wants to talk that he just let you know, and you will listen.
Libbiloos: I definitely think the being gay is something that is nature not nurture, So yes I believe that he could be gay. Gay people in our society are faced with so many challenges. I am very active in the gay community in Massachusetts although I myself am straight. I have two children of my own, so I understand what you must be going through. But he is healthy and not terminally ill, so there is nothing "wrong" with him. Gay is just a variation in genes and as far as I'm concerned its no different that blue or brown eyes.
Read more of this discussion or reply to this mom wondering about her gay 10 year old.
Image © Bryan Medders.