| Ask Zaida -"The Love Goddess" |
| Bring Out the Beast In Me! |
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Dear Zaida,
I know about acting "natural" during sex, but my problem is that I don't know how to bring out what is deep & natural within me.
I know in my soul that I am a top. During sex I almost always manage to top my partner, but it is not satisfying because
I know I am not really fulfilling my own fantasies of being a top (nor probably those of my partner's, either).
I have trouble talking dirty, and feel embarrassed by/inadequate to the master's tallk.
In my dating life I also find that I don't come across as a powerful, sexual, dynamic person, again because I have trouble letting out that forceful, sensual side of me.
Raised by women, I have always favored the feeling, caring, other-oriented side of myself, and now that part of my personality overshadows who I know I really need to be.
I don't want to lose that side of myself at all; but I do want to learn how to "walk the walk and talk the talk." Can you help?
Thanks.
| Dear Top,
As an advocate of breaking barriers, I think you should avoid being a slave to the expectation or stereotype of how a top should be. There are sensative tops and aggressive bottoms in this world. If it doesn't feel natural to "talk the talk", then there is no need for you to do so. Personally, I find nothing more annoying than a boy who can't shut up during sex and just enjoy the ride. I suggest that you stick to being yourself and focus on the task at hand - making love like nobody's business. When all is said and done, what you did will be more memorable than what you said. -Zaida |
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