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How To Start A Long Distance Relationship And Make It Last

Long Distance Relationship Tips

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How To Start A Long Distance Relationship And Make It Last
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Met someone while away on travel? Made a long distance connection online? These tips can help you start and maintain a long distance relationship:

Tip #1: Ignite the chemistry.
Since face-to-face time with your new (or old) interest is limited, the best way to build a burning long distance connection is to continue communicating via voice, video chat or text. Get to know him by asking questions about his life, including his hobbies, interests, work, friends and family. Share the details of your life as well and don't shy away from showing your true personality.

Tip #2: Read between the lines.
Body language is an important component to any personal relationship. What we don't say often shows through our body language–our eyes, our movements and gestures.

You may have only met your crush once or a few times in person, so most of your communication will happen absent of visible body language. The best you can do while apart is to read between the lines or pay close attention to the nuances of his other methods of communicating.

Notice the way in which he phrases words or the inflection of his voice on the phone. Tune into his mood as well as what he's trying to communicate.

It's much more difficult to gauge a person's interest or assess their emotions from behind a computer screen or mobile phone. Things can easily get misconstrued or may simply go unnoticed. Video chat as mush as possible. If something solicits an emotional reaction from you, ask him to clarify before jumping to conclusions. Text and chat may help push the conversation forward, but they leave emotion and inflection behind.

Tip #3: Make plans (often).
If you're anything like me, the more that I like someone, the more time I want to spend with them. It's not always easy getting together, depending on how far you live from each other. Make plans that fit both of your budgets and schedules and make them often. A distant connection can flat line quickly, especially if there wasn't a pre-existing bond built. Keep the sparks alive by making real contact as often as possible.

Tip #4: Manage expectations.
You may feel a spark when you first meet someone or hang on every word he's typed into a chat window, but nothing can replace the tell-all effects of person-to-person energy. The connection you feel while communicating from a distance may not be the same once you spend more time face-to-face. Keep an open mind and stay open to the possibility that you might not be as compatible as you thought or that you may need to spend more time getting to know each other. Also, long distance relationships can be extremely taxing on the emotions of both individuals. There's nothing worse than longing to be with someone that you can't touch or speak with. Sometimes the stress of being apart can overtake the connection that's being built. Keep checking in with each other, understanding that eventually you'll have to decide on a way to be together.

Tip #5: Be patient. Crawl before you pack up.
Long distance relationships are easier to start than they are to maintain, especially if the relationship isn't well established—enough so where the idea of a future together outweighs the strain of being apart temporarily. Take your time getting to know him. Discuss future plans, but don't move too quickly. Remember, person-to-person energy is far different than technology-based communication. So, be sure about direction of your relationship before uprooting your life and making long-term plans.

Tip #6: Enjoy the process.
Long distance relationships are difficult, but they can work for an extended amount of time. Few that I have experienced or witnessed have survived on a permanent basis, but the ones that thrive on the momentum to be together can be quite successful in the interim.

Enjoy the process of getting to know each other. Be creative with the ways you can interact. You might also want to take the time you are apart on self-improvement. Keep in mind that no relationship—long distance or not—can fulfill or replace personal deficits. The most successful relationships are ones where both individuals are take time to improve their own lives. Fill the gaps and enjoy the process of getting to know the other person. The future is unknown to anyone. So, enjoy creating whatever comes next.
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