What are the signs that you are gay? Are you really gay or are your thoughts about other men just a fantasy? Unfortunately, the answer to these questions aren't simple. It's important to ask yourself if you are both sexually and emotionally attracted to other men since being gay is more than just physical. There is an emotional connection that sets being gay apart from being gay curious or merely having same-sex fantasies. It's not unusual for guys to have sexual fantasies about other guys while they are exploring their sexuality. These thoughts are not concrete indicators that you are gay.
Despite common stereotypes, there is also no particular gay look or type of mannerism that reads gay. Gay people are extremely diverse. Some are more masculine than others. Some are more effeminate. Try no to fall into the trap of using stereotypes as an indicator of your sexuality.
How gay are you?
Also, sexuality is extremely fluid, meaning not all people are 100% gay or 100% straight (see Kinsey Scale
). Where do your feelings fall on the scale? You may be either gay, bisexual
or simply curious.
How to find out if you're gay
The best way to determine if you are gay is to explore your sexuality. Experiment with your attractions. How does it feel when you are with a man as opposed to a woman? Are you attracted to both on a sexual and emotional level or just one? Exploring your sexuality is a personal journey. You don't have to announce your exploration to others unless you are ready to
Coming in, then coming out
The proces of exploring your sexuality
both emotionally and physically is called coming in. However, once you have determined if you are gay men often start the process of coming out
to family and friends.